The Prevaricator

I called home as I usually do while climbing into my car and starting the nightly commute back across the Valley. WonderWife™ and I like to get our “how was your day” chit chat out of the way before I get home, so we are both free to bury ourselves in our laptops and get sucked in our mutually exclusive worlds of blogs, message boards and everlasting games of Wordscraper. WW™ passed the phone to the Bean. He said, “Hi daddy!” in the happiest, perkiest little voice you can imagine and we proceeded to have our first real phone conversation. I mean, a real back and forth question and answer session.

He asked me if I was going to be home before he went to sleep. When I told him no, I was going to be there in time for his bedtime stories, he told me what book he wanted me to read to him. He even began to quote passages from the book. The Bean went on to tell me that he was cooking in the kitchen. A little while ago, WonderWife™ had stumbled upon this awesome recipe for peanut butter and jelly balls. She had said that the Bean helped pour and mix and had a great time doing it. I figured that she decided to repeat the activity that day. The Bean then asked me if he could give me some of the pb&j balls when I got home. He’s a generous one, that boy of mine.

The conversation went on for a few minutes. Then he said goodbye and WW™ got back on the phone.

“So, you made peanut butter balls today?”
“No,” she said. “I’m sorry to tell you that we didn’t.”

That little fibber. I couldn’t believe it. Our first real phone conversation and it was all lies.