Tuesday, September 15, 2009

So Very Tired

I am tired all of the time. It doesn't take a sciencetician to figure out why. I work. A lot. I sleep. But not enough. I eat. Not always healthy. After 4 ever day, I'm constantly yawning. I'm lethargic when we hang around the house on weekends. I want to crash, but there are always things to do. My job gives me homework. When the kids nap, it's work time. If I nap when they are awake, I'm making WonderWife™ "work" as she needs to take care of the kids. That's unfair. She works longer and harder than I do. But trudging around the house like a Romero zombie isn't doing anyone any good. I'm not engaged. I'm not being a good dad.

It doesn't help that the Bean has yet to really learn how to play with others. When he asks me to play, he's really asking me to sit beside him while he pushes his cars around. It can be boring sometimes. The other day, I lay on his bed while he played. It wasn't long before I passed out. I'm fairly confident that I was snoring because I woke up to find the Bean staring at me, with a look that asked why I was disturbing his play time by sawing logs. I responded by putting my head back down and going back to sleep.

The solutions are right in front of me. Working out is a simple one. But honestly, I don't know where to find the time. Eating right demands will power that I am having trouble finding. I could go to sleep earlier, but this cuts into my precious quality time, where for a little while each day I get to write, watch some TV, have a conversation with WW™ or see some friends. There are times when my life feels overstuffed and squeezed, like a sausage in its casing.

I know that I need to make changes. For me. For my family. For my sanity. But it's really hard. I'm exhausted.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

Change is never easy. Nor is finding time to squeeze everything into the day (or night). I wish I could offer up a quick fix for you but I can't. I suppose just look at everything you do during a day and see where you might be able to cut something out.

Eating right and getting more sleep are things I know little about (since I'm not doing well there either). But falling asleep while playing with the kids - there I've had lots of practice.

Danielle said...

Feeling for you because I know how you feel.

OneZenMom said...

Wish I had a magic solution. Really do. But I only have well wishes and I-feel-your-pains and hang-in-theres.

SciFi Dad said...

Dude, preaching to the choir here.

I could totally have written this exact post, except my kids whack me upside the head when I fall asleep while playing.

Derek Armstrong said...

As most of the commenters on this blog are parents, I feel like a non-parent comment would be useful. So, from a non-parent -- I think exhaustion is just a way of life for adults, period, even if they don't have little ones wanting them to sit next to them while they move cars. I have exhaustion to blame for why I am not currently president of the United States. (Oh, and the fact that I only became eligible to hold the office two weeks before last election).

DGB said...

Thanks for all of your comments and support.

I guess the lesson here is twofold:

1) Every parent feels like this sometimes. Every parent blogger has written this post.

2) Never blog after a long, stressful day at work. It's like the equivalent to drunk-dialing an old flame.

Derek Armstrong said...

Oh yeah, and another part of this exhaustion -- it's like if someone ever told me I had a terminal disease, I'd be like "Yeah, that makes sense."

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

Wow! Do you mind if I just cut and paste this post into one of mine?

I'm with SciFi Dad where my kids whack me on the head or touch me a million times saying, "mommy mommy".

The only thing that has saved me is I started getting up just a little earlier or started fitting in exercise...swimming laps to be specific. It wakes me up for starters but I also subconsciously eat better...don't know why that is? But it has worked for me!

I still don't get nearly enough sleep but anytime I feel truly exhausted to the point of passing out I take a walk...with my kids or spouse and that is SUCH a re-energizer!

ericdbolton said...

[-part of the chior too-]

My problem is that when I can squeeze in the time to play... I'm getting frustrated because I haven't fix the fence or gotten the suburban pictures on craigslist.. :\

Have a good one bud.. when you figure something out.. Be sure to let us know..

wendy said...

Our lives are all too busy --I wish I had some suggestions for you. NOPE.
I am now retired as is my fiance and (not to rub it in) but we have ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD to do whatever. Kids all grown. Living in the country, see what you have to look forward too.
Try to stay awake long enough ok.

(have you tried meth ---JUST KIDDING!!!!!)