Chocolate Twinkies

My sister texted me: Have you tried chocolate Twinkies yet? 
My text back: Whaa?? 

A few days later, a package arrived containing a box of chocolate
crème Twinkies. (I love my sister.)

Mere moments after the kids were in bed, WonderWife™ and I broke open the box. She took the first bite.

“Doesn’t really do anything for me,” she said between bites. “But then again, neither do regular Twinkies.”

“So you totally don’t count on this one,” I said.

“Don’t get me wrong,” she shot back, “I’d eat the whole box if given the chance.”

My wife sometimes confuses me.  I rolled my eyes at her as I opened up mine. The snack looked like a normal Twinkie—same size, same shape. The only discernible difference was the color of the three dots on the bottom of the cake. They were brown instead of the traditional white. It was only upon taking a bite that the chocolate Twinkie revealed how different it was. In a standard Twinkie the crème and cake are both vanilla, so besides moisture the crème doesn’t add a lot to the flavor of the snack. But the chocolate added an entirely new dimension to the familiar Twinkie flavor. The crème had a richer-than-expected taste that stood out nicely against the spongecake.

The new flavor is a welcome addition to the Hostess arsenal and while I give them a lot of props for creating a new variation that actually tasted new, in the great chocolate vs. vanilla debate I am solidly in the vanilla camp. Also, I’m a Twinkie purist. So if given the choice I’d pick the standard version over the chocolate crème. That is until they make a peanut butter version.

(Have I mentioned lately that I love my sister?)

Birthday Cake Oreos

WonderWife™ was in the desert for a girl’s weekend. Knowing that once the kids were in bed, the evening was mine, I stopped to pick up a bottle of wine when out of the corner of my eye I noticed a brightly colored change on an ordinarily familiar package and there in the corner…yup “limited edition.”

In case you hadn’t heard, the famous Oreo cookie turns 100 this year. That’s quite an accomplishment for anyone, let alone a snack food. To celebrate, they created a special edition Birthday Cake version.

Even though both kids were in tow, I somehow managed to buy the cookies right in front of them without either of them noticing what I had done. (Of course I gave them a sample later.)

I was wondering how much Birthday Cake Oreos might differ from the original. The flavor of an Oreo cookie is so familiar that it’s easy to tell when there’s something different or amiss. I discovered this when trying a Canadian Oreo for the first time. Although the cookie was basically the same, there was something slightly unusual about the taste. (I later found out that Oreos are made with coconut oil in Canada, thus the difference.) From the package it looked like Birthday Cake Oreos had colored sprinkles in the crème. But there was no other indication on the bag that they might not be regular Oreos. The cotton candy-like aroma that wafted out of the bag once opened gave the first clue that something was different.

On the cookie, a minimalist “Oreo 100” design replaced the familiar Oreo pattern on the top wafer. Inside was a double-stuff amount of crème that had the appearance of a regular Oreo (taking the aforementioned sprinkles into consideration) but the distinct flavor of vanilla birthday cake. Yet even though the flavor was different, the cookie still unmistakably tasted like an Oreo. The subtle change of the crème added a new, somehow sweeter, dimension to the cookie. 

I get asked a lot why “new” food products excite me. To fully answer that might require delving too deeply into my psyche than one could do in a blog. But a simple explanation is that I’m impressed when making a small change to something can create a product that resembles the original but has its own new identity. The Birthday Cake Oreo is about the best example of a new product that does its namesake justice. They're just really good.  Happy birthday Oreo and thanks for your present to all of us.

The Bacon Milkshake

Three different people sent me the same link on the same day. One of them asking, “would you even drink this?” Clicking it led me to this amazing discovery:

To most the idea of adding meat to a milkshake is horrifying. But for me the answer to my friend’s question was a resounding yes! I would totally drink a bacon milkshake.

I clicked around the internet, somewhat pained by my sheer predictability, and learned that the Jack in the Box Bacon Milkshake was a semi-secret menu item created as a part of their Marry Bacon promotion (a campaign that I can truly get behind). The milkshake is not being put on their menu and would only be available for a limited time in very limited quantities.

To a lot of people putting bacon in a milkshake is everything that’s wrong with American cuisine. They may be right, but I’m not about to stifle anyone’s culinary creativity because you never know where magic could emerge. When I was a kid I united root beer and chocolate milk and discovered that it was a sublime combination.  

On the drive home, I happened to pass a Jack in the Box. As if guided by some strange bacony force, my car seemed to pull over on it’s own. Before I knew it, I was shouting the words “bacon milkshake” at the drive thru speaker box.

Now the shake had been discovered and purchased.  So the big burning question remained: the heck was it? I won’t bury the lead by telling you it was really good.

By sight, there was no discernible way to tell that there was a magical ingredient in the shake. It looked like the standard Jack vanilla shake—complete with whipped cream and cherry on top. But the first sip betrayed the shake’s bacony secret. The initial flavor that came through was rich vanilla, immediately followed by the familiar smoky taste of bacon. The flavors harmonized really well and the balance between the shake and the bacon was perfect—smoky, rich, sweet and a touch salty. Thankfully, the consistency was that of a regular milkshake and there were no visible bits of bacon to be found.

On the ride home I drank half of the shake and had to summon every ounce of my willpower not to finish it before I could share the spoils with the rest of the family. WonderWife™ apparently had not seen my Facebook profile and had not yet heard of the concoction, so was confused when I thrust a fast food milkshake into her hands and said, “drink it.”

“Is that bacon?” WW™ delightedly asked before taking another sip. “It’s really…good.” She seemed surprised by her own reaction.

Passing the cup to the kids, the Bean announced that he liked the vanilla, but didn’t like the bacon. My little carnivore Sprout, who might even love bacon more than me, licked her lips and begged for another sip even after the cup was empty.

I gotta hand it to you Jack in the Box. You make one hell of a meat shake. A bacon milkshake is certainly nothing that should be consumed on a regular (or even semi-regular) basis. But it was a fun novelty treat for three out of the four of us.

New Products: Canadian Edition

I used to write a lot about new food products. Not so much these days. In fact, the last time I wrote about something with the label “new” (my favorite label, followed closely by “limited edition”) was July 2010, and I got lambasted by my wife. Truthfully, there has seemingly been a lack of exciting new food products out there. Nothing worth writing about, at least. That was until I strolled into a Canadian branch of my beloved convenience store and found a few interesting items.

Let's start with this one:

 

Reese's Peanut Butter Cups are my undisputed favorite candy of all time.  I'm a sucker for peanut butter.  So it was with great excitement that I spotted this bar.  Notice the "limited edition" at the top?  Unfortunately the bar has nothing on the cup, which has the perfect chocolate to peanut butter ratio.  The bar is too heavy on chocolate, which was a bit waxy.  As they say, close but no...something.

Ketchup is not one of those flavors I seek when craving chips.  Outside of fries, onion rings and the occasional burger, ketchup doesn't make many appearances in my food repertoire--let alone spicy ketchup.  But far be it for me to resist a package of junk food that says "new" so I bought 'em and ate 'em.  Thankfully the ketchup flavor wasn't overpowering, and they weren't that spicy, but I'll take a bbq potato chip over these any day.

The last package didn't say "new", but falls under the category of "if they don't sell it in your country, it's new to you."  As with ketchup, pickle isn't a flavor I would associate with snack food.  This was the first time I'd seen it in a Dorito.  Normally Doritos all kind of taste the same, no mater what flavor.  Unlike their cheesy cousins, the pickle Doritos did have the unique tangy taste of a pickle.  Initially, this was startling. But after a handful, the flavor stared to grow on me and I nearly finished the bag.

Who knew there was such a snack food bounty hiding within my neighbors to the north?  Nice snacks you have there, Canada.

It's Real!

It's been a while since I've written about food on this here blog. While there have been a few new products out there which have gotten my attention, I haven't been compelled to discuss them there. I had heard a rumor about this product, but today it was confirmed so I am compelled to share.

This is soon to be my wife's favorite ice cream:

There are very few things in life that will make WonderWife™ laugh with glee like the infamous "Schweddy Balls" sketch on SNL. It's the perfect storm of juvenile and obscene that delights her to no end. I'm thoroughly tickled with how much she loves it. WonderWife™ and I don't always see eye to eye on pop culture and our senses of humor can be vastly different. So it's a big deal when something strikes both of our funny bones. "Schweddy Balls" does just that.

You can be sure that in the near future we will be buying ourselves a pint or two of Schweddy Balls.  I'll be sure to let you know when we do.  Mmm.  I can't wait to see how those Schweddy Balls taste. 
 
Be sure to check out EW's full story, complete with the video of the sketch.

My Very Own 3D Glasses

As I strode into the movie theater and gave the usher my ticket, I politely refused the 3D glasses he tried to hand me.

“No thanks. I brought my own,” I told him.

The usher looked somewhat confused and I don’t blame him. I very well might have been the only person in the theater wearing my own 3D shades. But if Oakley has their way, everyone will soon be.

Let’s face facts, 3D isn’t going anywhere. It’s quickly migrating from movie screens to our TVs and game consoles so it makes perfect sense that companies are starting to manufacture personal 3D glasses. I had heard that they were coming, but hadn’t really been paying attention. Then a rep from Oakely reached out to me.

Okay, full disclosure time: I was given a pair of 3D glasses from Oakley, but in accepting them I was under no obligation to write about them or pressured to give them a positive review. The products that I write about on this blog are things that interest me (even if they don’t contain bacon). Being the giant movie-geek that I am, how could I not test-drive personal 3D glasses?

You should know that I’m a fan of 3D movies. Well, I’m a fan of movies that make good use of 3D. Flicks like Avatar, How to Train Your Dragon and Despicable Me use 3D in clever ways to enhance the experience. So if a movie is conceived and shot in 3D, I don’t mind paying a bit more for that extra dimension.

The glasses soon arrived with a bunch of literature extolling the virtues of the lenses—premium optics designed to reduce glare and show truer colors, etc. I was excited to see if these claims were true. At the very least, it would be nice to have a pristine pair of glasses that nobody else had worn.

For the test run, I decided to see Tangled because I heard it was a good movie (and I secretly have a hair fetish, shhh). When it came to picking a theater, I encountered the first stumbling block of personalized 3D glasses:  not all 3D theaters are created equal. There are two different kinds of 3D—active polarization, which use glasses with an electronically controlled shutter, and passive polarization, which use standard disposable glasses. While the majority of theaters use passive, guess which one my favorite local theater uses? So I had to travel a little bit further to try ‘em out.

In the theater I settled into my seat and strapped on the Oakleys. They were comfortable, feeling good against the bridge of my nose without hurting the tops of my ears like some 3D glasses can. Aside from that it was hard to notice much of a difference. The picture did look a tiny bit sharper, but nothing overtly noticeable. It’s like when I hear an audiophile complain that mp3s don’t sound as good as CDs or records—I really can’t tell.  

After watching the movie (it’s very good, by the way) I began weighing the pros and cons of personal 3D glasses. The biggest con is that they aren’t cheap. The Oakleys retail for $150. Considering that theaters aren’t yet dropping the 3D surcharge if you bring your own glasses, these truly feel like a luxury item. While they are super comfortable to wear, and having my own glasses means I won’t be watching through scratched or dirty lenses, it’s unfortunate that they don’t work on every 3D screen (including 3D TV’s, which currently use active polarization).

I think there will be a market for personalized 3D glasses down the line—perhaps when there’s a more uniform system of exhibition is in place. But considering the love affair I have with my local theater, having my own glasses isn’t enough to lure me away. But I’ll happily wear them if I’m at a theater where the glasses work.

Bacon Flavored Update

We interrupt this blog to bring you breaking news in the world of bacony goodness:

The mad scientists at Jones have apparently created a bacon soda. I repeat, bacon soda.  The people behind Bacon Salt have partnered with Jones on this one.  Jones Soda is infamous for their annual holiday soda assortment, featuring flavors that were never meant to be carbonated (such as broccoli souffle and turkey with gravy).

If I may editorialize for a moment...Being somewhat insane daring I once tried the Jones holiday sodas.  Once.  Never again.  So as excited as I am to find and try the bacon soda, I'm not optimistic that it'll be very good.  (Kind of like bacon vodka all over again.)

That said, if there are any sightings of bacon soda out there.  Please let me know.

The Bacon Flavored Band-Aid

Friday night poker game at my buddy’s house meant a lot of pizza, a lot of beer and hopefully leaving with a few extra bucks in my pocket. As I was helping to set things up, my friend tossed something on the table.

I wasn’t sure what the true function of a bacon flavored toothpick was, but it had the magic word “bacon” on the package so you know that I was interested.

Since there were 7 of us there, I broke into the pack and as the cards were shuffled up and dealt, we each tried one. Here’s what we had to say:

“Tastes like a campfire.”

“Yeah, I taste campfirelisciousness.”

“It’s smoky and I love it.”

“It’s like sucking on a mesquite chip.”

“It tastes like my nightmares.”

“It’s got a bacony taste…and a band-aid taste.”

“Really, can I have one now? It's the band-aid that sold me.”

Our Life and New Products: He Said, She Said

There was a new email waiting for me when I logged on the other day. It was from WonderWife™. After reading it, I glared at her aghast.

“You really want me to post this on my blog?”

“Yes,” she said matter of factly. “People need to know the truth.”

I’ve never been one to limit anyone’s freedom of expression, and if I’ve learned anything in my marriage it’s that censoring my wife isn’t the smartest idea.

“You know that I’m going to need to write a rebuttal,” I told her.

“Fire away, Geek Boy,” she said.

So in what looks like it might become an annual feature, I present to you a guest post from WonderWife™:


It’s been well documented that DGB is a fan of anything labeled ‘new; or ‘limited edition’ or is otherwise labeled in a way to entice him to try the latest trends in junk food.

Today, as I randomly offered him a Tic-Tac, he noted, “I saw them in Pina Colada flavor at the convenience-mart earlier today.” 

Um, what? “Why didn’t you get them,” I demanded. “Were they labeled ‘new’?” 

When I was told that they were labeled “Summer Edition” I nearly lost my shit. How is that not the same as “new” or the like? What possible explanation could he have for passing them up? 

“I just wasn’t interested,” he lamely explained. 

Not interested?!?! Those words barely register with me. For him, each trip to the Sev for coffee, each trip to the mega-mart for groceries, each trip to the gas station (with attached bodega) all warrant a trip down the snack aisle in search of new products. And now he just waltzed right by such a treat. How can it be?

This isn’t the first time this kind of thing has happened. A few months ago, I was cutting coupons and the geniuses at Keebler were promoting a new cookie:

They’re labeled ‘new.’ They’re cheesecake, which is something that I’ve never known DGB to be opposed to. They even come in dark chocolate. I was sure that I’d stumbled on a winner, so had been looking for them each time I went to the mega-mart to no avail. Each time I was in Target, I took a slow walk down the cookie aisle. No dice. I’d even duck into convenience stores to see if I could find ‘em, but always walked away empty-handed. Then one day, DGB and I were at the mega-mart together and behold – there they were. I scooped them off the shelf and presented them to DGB as though they were an offering. And he promptly dismissed me them. 

“Eh,” he said. “I don’t really need them.” 

He has created a monster in me. I find it hard *not* to look for foods emblazoned with ‘New’ or ‘NEW’ or ‘Limited Edition’ on them. I have even enlisted my family to help in my quest of procuring the newest goodies for my husband. And now that he’s brushing them away right and left, I’m left confused and hungry for those goodies out there, labeled ‘new’ and calling my name.




Ahem.

Considering that my wife and I do not have many common interests, I am flattered that she’s developed an obsession with new products along side of me. However, as per usual when it comes to WonderWife™ and me, there are vast differences in how we go about life.

The accusations put forth by my wife here are indeed true. There have been a few new products that I have not bought or tried. Although I do love something new, it has to be something new and interesting to me for me to spend the money and calories on it. There could be a cilantro and mushroom bar with a “new” or a “limited edition” on it, but it doesn’t mean I’m getting it. There are dozens of new products on the shelves all of the time. I’d go broke trying all of them. Some of them just aren’t that unique. Milky Way’s Simply Caramel bar had a “new”. Chocolate and caramel may be new to them, but really it’s nothing blog worthy. 

In regards to the cheesecake cookies, WonderWife™ caught me at a time where I was thinking about trying to eat healthier. So while they did look good, they didn’t seem so extraordinary that we should’ve bought them, which would have lead to us devouring the whole bag that night while watching AFV.  When she was standing in the aisle with the bag of cookies that she was so desperate to find, she could have mentioned the extend of her quest.  She could have ignored what I said and bought them anyway.  But she relented and put them back on the shelf and walked away. 

In retrospect, I should have bought the Tic Tacs. If not for me, for my wife. She’s good enough to bring me home new products and it would have been a nice gesture to return the favor. And now that they are gone and I can’t find them again, I wish I had bought them cause now I really want to try them.*

So in that case it’s my loss. And hers.






*expect to hear about this from her in the comments

What Did They Do to M&M's Now?

“Sweet fancy moses, lookit that,” I said to WonderWife™ when I spotted the display at the other end of the grocery store aisle.

It took her a minute to see it. “Pretzel?” she asked.

“Not just that,” I pointed. “Look.” My finger drew her eye to the word “new.”

By now I’d completely turned my wife from a normal human being into a ravenous beast who craves new products as much as me.  She grew excited by this new discovery. 

“Let’s buy two!” she said.

So what was this new item, you ask? This:

Pretzel M&M’s are a brilliant idea. One that’s so deceptively simple I’m surprised it’s taken this long to arrive. I’ve spoken many times about the extreme pleasure I take in adding salty to sweet, and pretzel M&M’s turns that into a selling point. Right on the bag it says “crunchy, salty, sweet”.

When the kids were finally asleep, WW™ and I tore into the first bag over a couple of cocktails. (Ah, the simple pleasures of two tired parents on a Saturday night.)

Pretzel M&M’s are exactly what you’d expect them to be—an M&M with a pretzel center. They have a light texture, like biting into a malted milk ball. The promised salty/sweet combination hits the tongue right up front, making for a pretty tasty bite of candy.

Yet for the first time ever WonderWife™ may have been more enthusiastic than I was about a new candy. I guess I’m much easier to please when it comes to candy. I thought the M&M’s were really tasty, but I thought that they skimped out a little bit by making the chocolate layer too thin. She thought they had gotten the combination just right. She also appreciated the fact that because pretzel M&Ms were light on chocolate, that the bag was only 150 calories. (It is not in my nature to pay attention to such things, but if she considers this a big selling point that makes her happy, who am I to argue?

Pretzel M&Ms is the kind of new product that I like best. They actually put some effort into this one and didn’t simply change the kind of chocolate from dark to light, add some mint flavor or sprinkle a little caramel on it*. It’s actually a new product that completely changes the approach to a classic candy. If you like salty/sweet, you’re going to totally dig pretzel M&M's. We did.

*Caramel M&M's! Are you listening Mars Snackfood Corporation? That there’s an idea whose time has come

A Peek at the Future

A few weeks ago, I was amongst the many members of the Mac cult who perked up at the reveal of the iPad, thought about it and collectively said, "meh."  But after watching this, I get it now.  It may not happen right away but I think that based on how Wired magazine is going to be creating for the tablet, it is the thing that just might save publishing.

This is really cool stuff right here.

A Double Dose of Chocolate

Sometimes people take something good and do something completely unnecessary to it in an effort to make it better. This is the case when somebody covered a marshmallow in chocolate.

Returning home after work, I discovered a present for me placed on the pleather chair in my home office. It was a bag of Jet-Puffed Mallow Bites that were spotted and procured by the delectable woman I call WonderWife™.

Mallow Bites are a simple concept—mini marshmallows covered in milk chocolate. A thin layer of chocolate surrounds a mallow that is slightly less fresh than a normal one straight out of the bag. Anyone who’s ever eaten a Peep that’s been left out on the counter overnight knows the exact texture to which I refer. This is not necessarily a bad thing.

By the time I had gotten to them, the bag had already been torn open by WonderWife™, who could not or would not wait until I got home to sample them. She proclaimed them too sweet. But as I’ve said here before, there are very few things that are too sweet for me. I found the Mallow Bites to be really good and crazily addictive.

Now excuse me whilst I shovel a few more Mallow Bites into my face.

__________________________

A mysterious package arrived for me in the mail sent by my brother-in-law, Buckeye. Inside was a candy bar adorned with “limited edition” called Snickers Fudge. It’s awesome that my entire family is now enabling my new product obsession.

The main difference between Snickers Fudge and original Snickers is the caramel. While SnickFudge has peanut butter flavored nougat and peanuts, it’s missing this essential ingredient. I don’t know why they call the bar “fudge” cause there is very little about the bar that’s truly fudgy. But I’m sure the Snickers marketing department has their reasons, so who am I to argue?

It’s hard to go wrong when combining peanut butter and chocolate. And while there isn’t anything particularly wrong with SnickFudge, it’s just not that inspired. The peanut butter flavor is pretty mild, gladly stepping aside to let the milk chocolate become the dominating flavor.  I think WonderWife™ summed it up best when she said, “It’s good and I’d eat the hell out of it, but I miss the caramel.”

There is a reason why Snickers is the most popular candy bar in the country. While SnickFudge is decent, it’s not going to unseat the champion.

(Many thanks to Buckeye for the hook up. You are one of the good ones.  And thanks to WonderWife™ for coming up with Buckeye's internet nickname.)


**Totally unnecessary FTC disclaimer: I am not shilling for the above items.  They were bought with hard-earned money, consumed and reviewed because I am an obsessive freak who, for some reason, loves new candy products and needs to tell the world how I feel about them.

Of Wawa, Kakes and Cheeses of Bacon

I have the east coast in my blood and it's always good to go home, even if it means a total of over 10 hours of plane time with two small children and a wife who hates to fly. My wife, thankfully, is an east coaster as well. One of the pleasures of WonderWife's™ hometown are the many Wawa convenience stores sprinkled throughout.

I did not grow up with Wawas. My hometown had 7-11, as we do here in Southern California. While my love for the 'Sev is strong and unabated, I must confess that Wawa gives it a run for its money. It could be the made-to-order sandwich bar, where you can put together your masterpiece using a touch screen that has detailed options like "a little bit of mayo" or "extra oil". Perhaps it's the fresh baked Philly style pretzels sold at the register. But most definitely, it's the entire aisle dedicated to the greatest snack cakes in the history of junk food.

"Nobody bakes a cake as tasty as a..."

(If you can finish that line, than you know what I'm talking about.)

I was fortunate to grow up in a state that had access to the sugary goodness known as Tastykake. They are made in Philadelphia and are only sold in surrounding areas (though their reach keeps expanding). Tastykakes are one of the touches of home that I miss now that I live on the opposite coast. And at the Wawa, they have a whole bunch of them.

So imagine my surprise when I was perusing the Tastykake aisle of a Wawa, while the sandwich artisan behind the counter was preparing my Shorti, and I found this:

Not only is it a Tastykake, but it displayed two words that I love to see on any snack food, "limited edition."

Cheesecake Tastykake pie is exactly what you want it to be. It has a graham crust, thick enough not to get soggy and thin enough so that you don't get a mouth full of dry crust when you eat the pie. The filling has a rich, creamy texture and does a pretty good job of replicating an actual cheesecake. Good stuff indeed.

Speaking of good stuff, my mom-in-law (who in the past has provided me with experiments in bacony goodness) came through again this Thanksgiving by serving bacon cheese before the big meal.

It doesn't take a genius to figure out that bacon cheese is cheese with bacon in it. While I think the cheese itself was cheddar, it tasted more like deeply smoked gouda. It was really good on it's own, but it was downright excellent when placed upon a garlic cracker. I almost didn't have room for turkey.

But of course, I had room for turkey. Cause it was Thanksgiving. And I was on the east coast. My true home.

Baby Ruth Crisp

I know it's post-Halloween and you're all candied out, but lookit what I found on the shelves of the 'Sev!:

I'm a big fan of the "Crisp" bars. Kit Kats are great. Reeses Sticks are divine and Butterfinger Crisp just might be better than the original. I dig the way Crisp bars manage to keep the flavor of the bar they emulate while providing a completely different texture.

Baby Ruth Crisp offers the chocolate, peanuts and caramel of the original but adds layers of wafer and creme. As WonderWife™ and I dug into our Crisps, she told me that Baby Ruth just might be one of her favorite candy bars. While I like Baby Ruth, it's never placed in my top 5. But the Crisp is really good. Like the ones that have come before it, the signature Baby Ruth flavor is totally intact, but with a light crunchy texture from the wafers. The hit of salt from the peanuts seemed more prominent and the creme between the wafers is sweet, but compliments the chocolate well.

WonderWife™ and I both wished the peanuts had been more finely chopped and I thought that the layer of caramel was too heavy and chewy compared to the more delicate wafers. But these are minor complaints. The verdict on BRC was unanimous that it was not only tasty, but a total buy-again.

I Continue To Be Digusting

I love the gluttonous marathon of eating that comes along with Fair Day. The amount of food consumed by the attendees at a state our county fair is staggering. And I am right there with them, eating everything in my path.

In what's becoming an annual tradition (click here for 2007, here for 2008), here is a rundown of everything I ate at the fair this year:

Brownie
Beer
Deep Fried Bacon Cheeseburger
Deep Fried Frog Legs
Deep Fried Oreo
Garlic Parmesan Indian Fry Bread
Beer
Roasted corn
ChocolateCovered Bacon
Deep Fried Reeses Whipp
Beer
Pulled Pork Sammich
Curly Fries
Deep Fried Twinkie
Deep Fries Smores
Zucchini Weeni
Apple Fries

As you can see, there are number of favorites that repeat year after year. (I am a creature of habit.) Though I do like to try new things, which is why you'll see deep fried frog legs on the list this year. They had both a bland flavor and a rubbery texture of fish that's been overcooked. Don't expect them to show up again in the future.

Out of the new stuff the stand outs were the deep fried bacon cheeseburger. The patty itself contained the bacon and was then deep fried, giving it a crunchy outer layer. The added texture was a deliciously interesting addition to the burger eating experience.

Chocolate covered bacon was also highly memorable. The Bacon Bar didn't quite live up to my expectations, but this treat was bacon and chocolate the way I had been waiting for. A crispy piece of bacon was dipped in deep, dark chocolate and served chilled. The chocolate had a nice snap and the bacon had crunch. Sweet and salty. My only complaint was that some of the pieces chocolate to bacon ratio was tipped a little bit too much in the chocolate direction. But this is minor. Bacon covered chocolate is good stuff.

As my friends following me on Twitter learned, we decided against sampling the soy sauce ice cream. It's a decision I stand behind.

I'm now off to down a bottle of Pepto, turn on an episode of The Simpsons and curl up into a nice little food coma on the couch.

The Double Down

In what stands as a stark contrast to the recent unveiling of healthy food, the fine folks at Kentucky Fried Chicken have revealed a new creation that they called the Double Down. It’s got two slices of cheese and bacon between two fried chicken breasts that are used in place of bread.

It’s like they've been reading This Is Why You’re Fat for menu ideas.

As gluttonous as this sounds (and it is disgustingly gluttonous) it’s a lot better than the notorious KFC Famous Bowls, which piled ingredient upon ingredient in a bid to see if they could cram everything on the menu into one item, regardless of taste, texture or caloric content.

The Double Down is being test marketed in select locations around the Midwest, so sadly I cannot give you a full review. For now I can only dream about it, and ponder why we have an obesity crisis in this country.

Bacon Vodka

When I got home from work, there was a package waiting for me on the kitchen table. It was adorned with a sticker that said there was alcohol inside. Naturally, this piqued my attention.

Inside was a bottle of this:

This is a bottle of Bakon--bacon vodka. Yes that's right, bacon vodka.

I love bacon. But let’s face it, saying you love bacon is like saying you love chocolate. There aren’t a lot of people who are going to disagree with you. I also love vodka. It’s my booze of choice. It’s my parents’ booze of choice. This is most likely because of the Russian blood that flows through our veins. So what’s not to love about bacon infused vodka?

I knew there was only one person who would have sent this to me—my mother-in-law. She not only knows my obsessions, but she indulges them, much like her daughter. She’s quite a lady. (I’m not just saying that cause she reads my blog.)

Immediately after tucking in the Bean, I splashed some over ice into a cocktail shaker, shook liberally and poured it into a glass.

I took a sip.

A half hour later, WonderWife™ came home. I was in the other room, in my usual evening location—eating dinner in front of the TV.

WW’s™ voice called from the kitchen, “Did you try it?”

“Uh huh,” I said through a mouth full of food.

“Is this it in this glass?”

“Uh huh.”

“Uh, it smells terrible.”

“Uh huh.”

“Ew. It tastes horrible.”

“Uh huh.”

She was quiet for a moment.

“Ugh, the aftertaste!”

“Uh huh.”

So... I’ve got a nearly full bottle of bacon vodka, anyone have ideas about what I should do with it?

Strawberried Peanut Butter M&M's

After a few days of searching the candy aisles, I found them.

“Dammit,” said WonderWife™ upon seeing the bag in the sack of groceries. “I really wanted to be the one to bring these home for you.” (I’ve said it before and I will continue to say it: she’s a good woman, that one.)


M&M’s Strawberried Peanut Butter flavor has been launched as a tie in to Transformers Revenge of the Horrible Movie That’s Inexplicably Made a Gazillion Dollars. These candies are the best thing to come out of that movie. Though strawberry/peanut butter has about as much to do with transforming robots as mint crisp did to last year’s aging fedora adorned archeologist.

I really love peanut butter M&M’s—though I’m a sucker for peanut butter and tend to love anything made with it. Expectations were high for this one. Unlike traditional M&M’s, these guys have a peanut butter center with a taste and texture similar to the kind in the center of a Reese’s. Underneath the candy shell, is a thin layer of chocolate with strawberry flavor. The strawberry is decidedly artificial tasting, which isn’t surprising. You usually find it in strawberry candy (think Skittles, Starburst or Strawberry Quick). However, the artificial flavor clashed somewhat with the natural peanut butter of the inside. The peanut butter gave the candy a salty finish.

Strawberried Peanut Butter M&M’s were decent, but not quite as good as I was expecting. That said, the opened bag was left on the counter and I couldn’t help but finish it handful by handful throughout the day.

Although these weren’t the slam-dunk that the coconut M’s were, I applaud the effort. It feels like this year the candy companies are trying a little harder to put out some interesting new flavors, even though they know people like me will always buy them.

Coconut M&M's & Reese's Dark

Little did I know when I stopped at the ‘Sev for coffee this morning that there would be not one, but two new candy surprises waiting for me.

The first was Coconut M&M’s.


In the candy world, the combo of coconut and chocolate is dominated by Mounds and Almond Joy. While I like these bars, I am not a fan of the tiny coconut bits that are always left in the mouth after eating, no matter how much one chews. The coconut M&M’s, however, don’t actually contain any real coconut so I was optimistic that this would not be a problem.

The coconut M’s are plumper than the normal variety. It’s as if the M&M’s spent a weekend eating nothing but bags of M&M’s. Texture wise, they are pretty much the same as their plain cousins. Inside the shell is coconut flavored dark chocolate. Surprisingly, the emphasis of flavor is on the coconut. They tasted very much like a compact version of a Mounds bar...but without the tiny bits. Very tasty.


Next, I moved onto Reese’s Dark peanut butter cups.


The Reese’s Dark package wasn’t adorned with a “new” or a “limited edition” but I had not seen it before. Apparently, Reese’s has mixed dark chocolate and peanut butter sporadically in the past—most recently last summer as a tie in with The Dark Knight. Somehow I missed it. So to paraphrase an old TV slogan, if I haven’t eaten it, it’s new to me.

Peanut butter is one of my favorite foods and I actually prefer dark chocolate to milk, so I was exited to try them. Opening the package, the most striking thing is that the cup is the same dark color as the famous wrapper. The dark chocolate is a great foil for the peanut butter and makes for a richer taste. While they are sweet, they are slightly less sweet than the milk chocolate variety. The salt in the peanut butter was sharper. I’m happy that Reese’s Dark didn’t come with a “limited edition” because I dare say that I would pick these over the milk chocolate ones.

Amazingly in this round, I went two for two in good new products. Now if anyone could tell me where I could find Strawberried Peanut Butter M&M’s, I would be a happy, happy geek.

Flashback Friday: Adventures in Coffee

My love for 7-11 and new products has been well documented on the pages of this blog. This Flashback Friday travels back to February 2007, when I tried "Energy Coffee" from the 'Sev.


9am: Out of all of the unnecessary new products I've come across, this may be the unnecessariest: Energy coffee.

Yes that's right...energy coffee. Seen it for a week or two, but have been hesitant to try it. Anyone who's been on the receiving end of one of my caffeine fits will tell you that the less energy there is in my coffee, the better. But you can only withstand the pull of the weasel for so long so this morning, I'm having my first cup.

It's actually not bad. Kind of has that herbal taste that tea does, but it's a pretty good flavor of coffee.

But if you find me massacred on my office floor, you'll know why.


2pm: Made it past lunch without jumping out of my skin and/or annoying everyone around me. Looks like Energy Coffee has passed the test.

But would I buy it again...?


3:15pm: Digesting lunch and crashing hard. Beginning to question the wisdom of "energy coffee."